I'll Haiku You!!

I've come to hate one of my teachers more than I thought I could.

After I gave a lesson plan that was really supposed to be on my own teaching methods she lectured me, the girl I did the lesson with, and the people who did one after us on not using Judith Michaels (some writer) in our writing.. 

Then praised the lesson on Haiku and asked why it's so important. I figure it's because the Japanese probably teach sonnets, so we should teach Haikus.

So after being pissed off, I had a Haiku for her...

I do it myself

No need for Michaels' help

I'll do it alone

Also she constantly says "what are we seeing her.. what is happening" 

My instant thought is "your mom"

Soon

Before I leave to London in 45 days, I am going to do stand up comedy at Wise Guys on the open mic night. 

I'm nervous and I'm not sure exactly which day I'll be doing it, but I am for sure.

I want to be rich and I want to be famous

Did you ever have the night where you don't know what the fuck you're doing except that what you're doing is something completely wrong? Oh yes those nights are now my reality. As a drunk little girl talked to her ex and he lied about something we both knew was a bad idea because he's a lazy ass. But the result was much needed release for the both of us. The morning texts were sorries and sheeshes, but understanding that whatever the fuck. Hilarity came about in my life at that moment when I realized how ridiculous my actions were and how ridiculous his were as well. The hilarity was not construed at the beginning, but the moment I heard the words I will not utter, it transpired. 

While talking to some people and my mind fully clear, I began discussing how I've known little kids that I've wanted to shove and push down on the ground. Let me tell you, later I realized being pushed on the ground hurts your ass. But in my defense, those little kids deserve being pushed on the ground by someone bigger than them. I feel they need to see that it's not fair when they pick on smaller kids because it's rude. Also when they are being little douche bags and treating adults like they're nobody, I feel like if I pushed them down, they really deserve it and it's not my fault that they are turds. 

I would trade a BLT minus tomato for Molly right now. 

I got a cantaloupe the other day and assumed my mom would eventually cut it for me. Apparently she would've had I just asked her. I feel that if I had her cut it for me, it'd make her feel good about herself. She would get a nice pat on the back from me and a hug and a thank you. I know moms like that kind of thing. 

Friends

I don't actually have friends on this except my Hailey. 

I wish I had more, but it's ok because I'm not too entertaining. 

Wisdom teeth hurt when coming out. 

Ick.

I absolutely hate when little kids have to get into the picture and end up ruining it.

This is Chowder.. I fell in love with him..

Me and Chowder pwn.

He cuddled with me in the mornings in St. George.

I love this little girl more than anyone in the world. She owns my heart. 

I heart cross stitch

A conversation worth keeping

K - Fine. It counts, but you're still one of two people.

T - I'll take that.

K - You know what other people were two people? Hitler and Stalin.

T - Whaaat?

K - You're like Hitler for never having tasted a plum.

T - Yeah, but that just means I'm loved and feared by loads of people.

K - And it's like you killed 80,000 Jews.

T - So. There obviously was enough to procreate.

K - Think about the next atrocity you could avoid if you just go eat a plum right now. The next genocide you cause might be irreversible, Frau Hitler.

T - But I don't have a plum.

The trip

I just saw a guy trip. He almost caught himself when he was running, but it just forestalled the inevitable.. It was like watching a tree fall.

He made himself seem like a better person than he actually was.

Library on 4th

Sketchy drug dealer sitting next to me on a couch. 

He just "smoked a guy out" and picked up his crying baby.

Meanwhile outside,  I watch boys and girls with too big of clothes smoke and play hacky sack.

The boy in the tight black jeans, white shirt, and sunglasses struts to the beat of his ipod.

He walks with his shoulders back and as tall as possible; 

almost like he's on a runway and not the sidewalk of the Salt Lake City Public Library.

Bicycle after bicycle after bicycle. 

Ten bikes ready to be stolen. Ten and a half if you count that barrel thing on the back of one. 

I should give people the benefit of a doubt and not assume they'll get stolen.

But I won't.