Pffft I'm the sexiest thriller of the year.. Douche..

So I leave in 1 week. I'm pretty excited, but very nervous. I have so much to do still.

Here's a poem.

A Dinosaur (I’m not tasting anything)

 An empty fire pit with kids sitting telling stories

Little girls sharing secrets and giggling

Softness and tendernous

Small voices saying “ooh and ahh”

Lying on the grass with flowers in their hair

Staring at the white and gray clouds

Surrounded with blue air

It smells like spring time

Here is the beauty after a long winter

Haha take that stupid nature loving teacher whom I hate. It turned out great and I left early.. 

Ok so I asked Bear to come over tonight and he said he had a study group and I said "meh." A little after 6 today he texted me and said that his group was canceled and that he and Derby could come up for a bit if I wanted.

Well of course I want! So he came over and it was fun. We just talked a little and stuff. I'm starting to think he might miss me a little bit. Fantastic! Derby is such a fatty! He's bigger than Reggie almost and he's not supposed to be at all! I love him so much.

He was at brunch with his mom the other week and they were talking about his graduation. He then proceeded to tell her that I was getting ready to leave for London and she told him to tell me congratulations and good for me. He told me that every time he'd start talking about his graduation, she'd start talking about how excited she was for me. How nice! I miss her. I know that she's probably thinking Bear's a dummy for letting a catch like me go hahaha! Jokes.

And now for some pictures!

I am infatuated with this guy

Let's do this! I'm a cashew!

This weekend was fantastical. Friday I picked my mom up from the airport and hung out with her all night. Saturday I had lame work, but then I saw Hippie real quick which was nice, a little weird, but nice.

I got to go to the Bee's game with Bina and Anna and it was amazing! It was a little cold as well, but worth it. I miss Bina, I wish I saw her more.. Pfft.

Today I had lame work again. I spent most the morning with my darling Myha. I love that girl more than anyone. She makes me so happy. 

I just got home from dinner with Bear. It wasn't awkward at dinner at all. It was really nice and it made me miss him, but I don't mind.. We might've kissed a little and stuff haha.. I'm glad he wanted to see me before I left.

Now french homework.. ugh

Pictures that my friend took of me

Apparently I'm not big on the smiling thing..

My car is so freaking dirty

A conversation with my boss

Me - Do we have an electric drill?

Him - No.. Why do you need one?

Me - To drill your mom.

Oh and this

Je pense.....

Quand j'avais 13 ans, je savias que j'etais en amore avec l'idee de vivre a Paris.

Mais maintenant, je veux etre dans Chicago.

Quand j'ai 26, je veux etre la.

I know it's annoying that I write multiple posts at a time, but I don't like clumping them together.

Hippie is pretty great. He waited for me after class today, but I had to leave early. Too bad he's like a real hippie and smokes the weed.

Missionary and I are going out Friday.. Woo!!

I leave in 2 weeks and 2 days...

I miss the Bear.. 

It's just being with someone so long that you're uncomfortable without them...

Poems from Kobayashi Issa

 New Year's morning - 

everything is in blossom!

I feel about average.

------

For you fleas too

the nights must be long,

they must be lonely.

Don't kill that fly!

Look - it's wringing its hands,

wringing its feet.

------

In this world

we walk on the roof of hell,

gazing at flowers.

Random poem from class

Ballad of Oranges and Grapes by Muriel Rukeyser

After you finish your work
after you do your day
after you've read your reading
after you've written your say —
you go down the street to the hot dog stand,
one block down and across the way.
On a blistering afternoon in East Harlem in the twentieth century.

Most of the windows are boarded up,
the rats run out of a sack —
sticking out of the crummy garbage
one shiny long Cadillac;
at the glass door of the drug-addiction center,
a man who'd like to break your back.
But here's a brown woman with a little girl dressed in rose and pink, too.

Frankfurters, frankfurters sizzle on the steel
where the hot-dog-man leans —
nothing else on the counter
but the usual two machines,
the grape one, empty, and the orange one, empty,
I face him in between.
A black boy comes along, looks at the hot dogs, goes on walking.

I watch the man as he stands and pours
in the familiar shape
bright purple in the one marked ORANGE
orange in the one marked GRAPE,
the grape drink in the machine marked ORANGE
and orange drink in the GRAPE.
Just the one word large and clear, unmistakable, one each machine.

I ask him: How can we go on reading
and make sense out of what we read? —
How can they write and believe what they're writing,
the young ones across the street,
while you go on pouring grape into ORANGE
and orange into the one marked GRAPE —?
(How are we going to believe what we read and what we write and we hear and we say and we do?)

He looks at the two machines and he smiles
and he shrugs and smiles and pours again.
It could be violence and nonviolence
it could be black and white      women and men
it could be war and peace or any
binary system, love and hate, enemy, friend.
Yes and no, be and not-be, what we do and what we don't do.

On a corner in East Harlem
garbage, reading, a deep smile, rape,
forgetfulness, a hot street of murder,
misery, withered hope,
a man keeps pouring grape into ORANGE
and orange into the one marked GRAPE,
pouring orange into GRAPE and grape into ORANGE forever.